Archive: Blargh

Lot to vent out, few to listen it feels. So I walk in the morning and at night, I can't even describe how different my neighborhood feels from my morning walks to my evening (just before the sun sets). Morning is nice and pleasant, people going off to work or school, sun rising and its usually alot warmer by the end than when I started. But the biggest thing is, I feel comfortable and don't feel ill at ease ever.

Evening comes, I really don't like walking then. About 85% of the people, no problem. Other joggers/walkers on the sidewalk, all nod and say hello. But then you get that group of folks that just make you feel uncomfortable. The ones that won't move out of the way a bit so someone can walk by on the sidewalk, or drive by in a car full of guys and yelling whatever they are yelling but it scares you shitless.

Blah.. I'm fighting with myself wondering if its me wanting and excuse to not walk (i didnt walk over the weekend, due to it pouring down freaking raining). It'd only be a month till I got the treadmill and then no excuses.

Vincent is at his father's house in Kentucky, my feelings and emotions on that one are well, all over the board. I want him to find what he needs, whatever it is from his father that he can't get anywhere else. I want him to figure it out and get past it. What I'm scared of is that he'll want more, that he'll want to stay there, that he'll think its better there than it could ever be at home.

I'm not afraid of the truth, I've told him more stuff about the divorce and the facts of the matter than I probably should have. But he deserved to know the truth of things, and I didn't want to lie to him.

blah..head not on right atm..