Paperwork
UGH! YUCK! So much freaking paperwork its not funny. And the phone calls. Good grief. Call social security, call this insurance, call that insurance, call the car dealership, visit the attorney. And everyone wants their own copy of the death certificate which costs 17 bucks a piece. Here your loved one has died, we're sorry, but if you want to collect that insurance we owe you, jump through our hoops and make sure you dont forget to cross your t's and dot your i's.
Its not horrible, but I can just see how it would be worse. And we have several calls still to make today, ones that called back yesterday while we were out with the lawyer.
Also, everyone is dealing more with their own mortality, and mom especially wants to make sure everything after her now passes to Dan and I. Thats fine, I told her I can deal with the business end of it, I just proved myself here. Nothing like trial by fire on that one. But heres the big part of it, now some might call me stupid, I say its just who I am. My parents have a house free and clear, been paid off for a few years. My brother lives at home still, and my parents always loved having him here. Its not a hardship or a burden, its how it is. When mom dies (which the way the women in our family live, won't be for 20-30 more years at least) I think Dan should get the house. We all agree on that part. What freaks my mother out is that I don't want 'half' the value. Its not a small amount, I'll freely admit that, but whats involved in getting that amount I cannot do. It would mean my brother would have to mortage the house to pay me my half, and therefore be paying me technically for years. That makes my stomach churn to think of. I cannot fathom that money is worth more than my brother's well being ever could be. Hes not rich either, and if he ends up having the house to deal with entirely, well hes going to need every dime hes got.
Mom wants it to be a more 'fair' distribution, well fine. Make up for it with insurance or whatever, we know I'll be the one paying and taking care of all that anyways. Dan won't want to step up, he didn't this time why would that change. Not that I blame him or upset about that at all. I'm not. He couldn't do it, I wanted to do it, it works out in my opinion. I told my mom, my brother's state of mind and life are worth more than anything. I don't know him as well as I would like too, I guess no one really does according to mom. I just don't want to make his life harder. Now if he goes off and gets married, moves out or whatever, then fine, we can do it differently. But as long as hes living here, I will NOT make him mortage this house.
My kids are all doing well, got themselves off to school the first day, and Brian has worked out that he can stay home till about 6:30 so he'll be able to make sure they are awake before he goes. He'll be home a bit early as well so all should be alright. I miss them, report cards for Vin and Kat come out today and I'm all excited cause I was told yesterday they are doing awesome this time, a's and b's!! Vincent's average went from a 2.8 to a 3.2 from last year... WOOT!
Did I mention I have awesome children?
Its not horrible, but I can just see how it would be worse. And we have several calls still to make today, ones that called back yesterday while we were out with the lawyer.
Also, everyone is dealing more with their own mortality, and mom especially wants to make sure everything after her now passes to Dan and I. Thats fine, I told her I can deal with the business end of it, I just proved myself here. Nothing like trial by fire on that one. But heres the big part of it, now some might call me stupid, I say its just who I am. My parents have a house free and clear, been paid off for a few years. My brother lives at home still, and my parents always loved having him here. Its not a hardship or a burden, its how it is. When mom dies (which the way the women in our family live, won't be for 20-30 more years at least) I think Dan should get the house. We all agree on that part. What freaks my mother out is that I don't want 'half' the value. Its not a small amount, I'll freely admit that, but whats involved in getting that amount I cannot do. It would mean my brother would have to mortage the house to pay me my half, and therefore be paying me technically for years. That makes my stomach churn to think of. I cannot fathom that money is worth more than my brother's well being ever could be. Hes not rich either, and if he ends up having the house to deal with entirely, well hes going to need every dime hes got.
Mom wants it to be a more 'fair' distribution, well fine. Make up for it with insurance or whatever, we know I'll be the one paying and taking care of all that anyways. Dan won't want to step up, he didn't this time why would that change. Not that I blame him or upset about that at all. I'm not. He couldn't do it, I wanted to do it, it works out in my opinion. I told my mom, my brother's state of mind and life are worth more than anything. I don't know him as well as I would like too, I guess no one really does according to mom. I just don't want to make his life harder. Now if he goes off and gets married, moves out or whatever, then fine, we can do it differently. But as long as hes living here, I will NOT make him mortage this house.
My kids are all doing well, got themselves off to school the first day, and Brian has worked out that he can stay home till about 6:30 so he'll be able to make sure they are awake before he goes. He'll be home a bit early as well so all should be alright. I miss them, report cards for Vin and Kat come out today and I'm all excited cause I was told yesterday they are doing awesome this time, a's and b's!! Vincent's average went from a 2.8 to a 3.2 from last year... WOOT!
Did I mention I have awesome children?
posted by Tammy at
5:49 AM
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